Truly listening, without trying to solve problems, can unlock real self-understanding.
It's been a while since we last spoke.
How are you?
Really,
how are you?
Take a moment here.
How are you?
When I was younger, I had so much time to explore my emotions and thoughts. I could spend hours with my notebook, writing and asking myself. But now? I don't know where my notebook is.
It's not that I don't have time - I do.
It's because I don't have the attention to put into journaling anymore.
During my journey toward success, toward building my business, I've noticed it's become more difficult to maintain that inner connection. But then I discovered something rather unique and simple: journaling with a person through conversation.
The Conversation
Journaling with another person in conversation is completely different from solo journaling. When done properly, it can be more rewarding and more satisfying. It can help us in our business and personal lives because life isn't just about business, real estate, investments, or career advancement.
Life encompasses so many areas we want to grow in: money, health, relationships with loved ones, romance, fun, and recreation. We often think that if we grow our business, everything else will automatically grow too. But I'm here to tell you - it's not always the case.
I've met very successful entrepreneurs making millions of dollars, and some of them were miserable. Money is important in the physical world - it can buy physical things. But happiness exists in the emotional world. And happiness doesn't equal satisfaction. You can be happy but not satisfied, or satisfied but not happy, because satisfaction is a deeper emotion.
Even deeper than satisfaction is fulfillment. All of this - happiness, satisfaction, fulfillment - we can explore through coaching when done properly.
About Listening
The most important element for successful coaching conversations - and this is the biggest realization I've had this year - is the ability to truly listen to the other person.
Think about it: right now, as you're listening to me, you're processing what I'm saying in your head. You're thinking about how this affects your life, basically thinking about yourself. This is natural and great for learning - we need to put information in our heads to learn it.
But when we're in a coaching conversation with someone else about their life, we should not do that.
Here's what I've learned: when someone is explaining their life and we ask questions, are we asking because we want to understand more information? If so, this isn't effective coaching. I don't listen to analyze anymore. I try to be as engaged with the other person as possible.
About Information
I don't need more information from my clients because they already have all the information and the brain functionality to process it. They know more about their life situation than I ever could - they remember everything from fifth grade until today. They are who they are.
I don't need data to "solve" their problems because I'm not here to solve their problems. I'm here to listen and explore with them. My clients need to come to a deeper understanding of their own desires.
This is the most valuable lesson I've learned this year: it doesn't matter what worked for me. All that matters is what you want to do. It doesn't matter what's possible - all that matters is what you want, what your desire is.
You Know the Answers
If you don't know what you want, it doesn't matter what's possible or what others have done. All that matters is identifying your desire and how you want to pursue it.
Here's something surprising: you already know all the answers. You know how to create the life you want to create. Deep inside, you know how it's going to look and feel, and how to get there.
With this deeper understanding of yourself, you'll realize you don't need more courses. All the information is already there. What you might need is more focus, commitment to action, and deeper understanding of who you are as a being. Then you can do more, accomplish more, and truly deliver.
Thank you for today.
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